Sunday, January 17, 2010

Sorry

First of all i want to say sorry. I realise my last post was a little vague and erratic so i'm sorry for that. But thank you for all the support. I shouldn't post when i'm in a crappy mood like yesterday.

I'll try and clear things up for you now.

I'm thinking of breaking up with sexy abs. So i've been feeling a little all over the shop lately and i just dont know how i feel about him. I mean he's nice and everything but i dont know. I dont really seem to have any sort of connection there anymore. We didn't see each other yesterday like i was hoping for which really sucked cause i was hoping to talk to him. Instead i had to bring it up with him on facebook. Which wasn't ideal. I told him i was really confused and i wasn't sure how i felt about him and us. He asked me what i wanted and i said i dont know. Then he asked me what i thought i wanted. And i couldn't answer him. I dont even know what i think i want (if that makes sense). I apologised lots of times and said i'd really like to see him today just to talk things over. I'm 80% sure i''ll dump him today but i dont know. I just feel like i'll see him and want to kiss him all over again. I'm so confused. Why can't life be easy. Another reason i want to dump him is because i thought about cheating on him the otehr day. I very seriously considered it. But i didn't do it. I dont want to be that person, i dont want to be that sort of guy. But i was more than ready for it and thats just as bad as cheating on him. I'm just so confused. Maybe i wasn't ready for a boyfriend. Maybe we've just run our natural course. God why can't things be easier. His situation hasn't helped this any either. I dont know what to do. And if we break up how do i do it. I've never broken up with anyone before. I wouldn't know where to start. He really is a nice guy and i dont want to hurt him. Hopefully we can see each other today and sort things out. Now i'm more sure that i want to break up with him. God dammit

I did talk to a couple of friends about it but thank you for all your offers. I'm still waiting for my 10 comments on my help me post but :P

2 comments:

  1. You didn't even reply to me message. Snob! :P

    ReplyDelete
  2. So agree .. Aaron he didn't mine either .where is that wet noodle at to beat him with... Dude you so not a bad person. This happens and really it not your fault .. what would be bad if you lead him on and still felt this way ... On breaking up it fucking sucks .. .just going threw it my self. I did the break up . Be honest tell him what you told us. Wouldn't bring up thinking of cheating but tell him everything else .. nothing wrong with not being ready yet. But if you ever come down on your self like that .. so not going to like me ... lol .... I am in your corner . Wish it was easier... Man .. but it fucking sucks... it helps though having people like Oct, Aaron , Biki .. and many others ... all gave me words of support... when I had to call my relationship off ... be thinking of you ... Let leave the kicking in the teeth for something that deserve it ok man
    Lee

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